Happy Valentines Day?

in bakery window at the mall

I love Valentines Day! It's my next favorite holiday after Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter. Some holidays I can’t get too excited about, but Valentines – what’s not to like about Valentines? The whole holiday is centered on love (ok, and a little commercialism) and it’s a wonderful opportunity to tell friends and family just how much they mean to us! Flowers, teddy bears, chocolates – so tell me, what’s not to like about that? And there’s certainly nothing not to like about LOVE!!! Is there?

I’ve lately started seeing Valentines candy in Setiabudhi, our grocery store which “caters to Westerners." The first time I saw it on the shelves, I started thinking that I would surely love to buy a box of chocolate for Ibu Aisah, our cleaning lady who works so hard and who by the way loves chocolate. I also thought it would be nice to buy some for our Chinese landlady who is a constant help to us (sending over as many rat traps as we need, having the boys clean dog barf from our porch each morning and a myriad of other practical things that make our life here easier). My plan was to make the purchase closer to February 14 since everything gets stale very quickly here. My thought all along has been that showing love, kindness and respect to others could cross all cultural bounds. It never occurred to me that a gift given in that spirit might not be received in the same.

Valentine shoe sale?

I told Ronnie my plans and he promptly informed me that Muslims don’t like Valentines. WHAT? NO LIKE VALENTINES?!? Who doesn't like Valentines?? Well, come to find out, the Muslims don’t. It seems that our kind of love goes against Islamic sharia law. So any “participation” in a non-Muslim holiday (and that would include receiving Valentine candy) is strictly forbidden for Muslims. Islam has only 2 major holidays which they are required to celebrate. Valentines is obviously not one of them, so it and all others are forbidden.

An article I read on this topic states “Valentine’s Day …. is a pagan and polytheistic holiday. Hence it is not permissible for any Muslim who claims to believe in Allaah and the Last Day to participate in it, approve of it, or congratulate anyone on its occasion. Moreover, it is obligatory to abandon it and distance oneself from it in response to the command of Allaah and His Messenger so that one may thereby be distanced from the anger of Allaah and His punishment.”

It further states “it is obligatory for every Muslim to adhere strictly to the Quran and Sunnah in every situation and at all times, especially in times of temptation and corruption. It is incumbent that he or she understand, be aware and be cautioned from falling into the deviations of those whom Allaah is angry with (i.e., the Jews) and those who are astray (i.e., the Christians) and other immoral people who have no fear of punishment or hope of reward from Allaah, and who give no recognition at all to Islam.”

A different article from islamweb.net states “Undoubtedly, going along with them in their festivals may, in some cases, lead to disbelief. Dabbling in these things, at the very least, is a sin.” So, there you have it.

Setiabudhi market - chocolate section decorated with hearts

I have learned since starting this post that Muslim youth in Bandung have been forbidden by the Indonesian Council of Ulemas in West Java to celebrate Valentine’s Day on February 14. Another article appeared this week in the Jarkarta Globe warning Muslims against celebrating Valentines Day saying “We must prevent the Muslim younger generation in Aceh from being poisoned by a culture that contradicts our Muslim values.” Pretty clear, I’d say.

So today we went to a large shopping center here in Bandung. I took my camera and purposely searched for evidence of Valentines Day. Keeping my eyes peeled for red and pink, I found only a few indications here and there. Apparently there are enough Chinese and non-Muslims to make the holidays worthwhile for an occasional merchant.  

a modern store front at Hyper Mart obviously caters to the non-Muslim crowd

So, as not to offend Ibu Aisah or make her “sin" and put her in the bad graces of Allaah, I will not give her Valentines chocolates after all. I can and will still give her chocolates - just not today. Our Chinese landlady who is a Christian will still get hers.

Oh, and did I say it? HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!